Betty Broderick was denied parole yesterday for the murder of her ex-husband and his new wife a few decades ago. I believe she is a crazy, angry, ex-wife with no sense of boundaries and no ability to acknowledge her own fault, and needs to stay in prison, probably forever.
Through 35 years of handling divorce litigants, I've never had a murder in any of my cases, and very few serious injuries by one spouse against the other no matter how many threats were made, how angry people were, or how disastrous the outcome of court proceedings.
When threats to kill have been made [to a spouse, new girlfriend, or relative], I'm generally comfortable in reassuring my client that the risk of actual harm is pretty minimal - people make threats in the heat of arguments, usually to get attention, and don't really carry them out in the vast majority of cases, especially in middle and upper class America where my clients reside. As long as they aren't blinded by drugs or alcohol, they always have the ability to understand that mayhem isn't a successful life strategy, let alone socially unacceptable. Then, to paraphrase Chris Rock, there's always that episode of CSI that makes them think they might not get away with it, so they do something less permanent.
Betty was an angry person. Her marriage failed. I have no doubt she contributed to its failure. Maybe it was as simple as choosing to marry someone who wasn't faithful or one likely to think that a stable marriage for his children was less important than an exciting new relationship. On the other hand, maybe the craziness she later exhibited was symptomatic of a person who wasn't too easy to live with, and may have been emotionally abusive in her own right; maybe anyone fun and pleasant to be with was a welcome change, and it wasn't just that she was younger and thinner.
When you speak to the other participants in her legal process, as have I, you hear a very different picture of Betty - she was loony during the divorce process - her inability to obey restraining orders was a clear indication of that [her having had multiple, competent lawyers, is always a concern as well].
I wasn't a friend or even an acquaintance of her ex-husband, and never met him; I have no opinion about his merits as a lawyer, father, or spouse, and frankly don't care. But I've seen cases with people like Betty, and it's not a pretty sight. You can't explain anything to them; you can't get them to behave; they blame everything on their spouses, their lawyers, minor's counsel, therapists, or the judges; and, they are the creators of their own demise.
They believe that everyone is against them, and don't understand their own role in the process - true paranoia. Usually it doesn't lead to violence. They usually just go from lawyer to lawyer to find someone to believe in them for a while, or they try to represent themselves until they antagonize the judge and everyone else in the process.
Maybe they run over the ex-spouse's mailbox every year on their anniversary, but rarely murder. They rant and rave and repeatedly tell their own versions of history, but the experience of the judicial officers, custody evaluators, and documentary evidence, generally show a different reality than they try to present as the case unfolds.
This isn't a woman who was beaten, controlled, and manipulated during a marriage, and felt she had no where to go - there's a certain sympathy for the woman in that situation who feels she has no alternative but to stop the abusive spouse's breathing. Even then, I'm not comfortable that they go into the general population when they establish the level of abuse - they had other remedies, their minds just didn't allow them to see them in most of those cases.
With Betty, we have someone who felt she had to get revenge for being left behind. I understand her anger, fear of the future, and sense of loss. I don't understand her reaction - with an abusive spouse, murder may be the only obvious remedy - Betty wasn't seeking a remedy for her situation, she wanted punishment.
She wanted to be cared for the rest of her life, and wanted to remain a socialite - in a sense, she now has both, all stemming from the death of her ex-husband - perhaps she got what she wanted, although without the freedom to mill among us. I think it's wise to keep her there, both for our safety and to serve as an example to others who may need her lesson to guide their behavior.
