Divorce And Mediation Blog

Today, courtesy of Google, I received a link to a webpage titled something like "Free Divorce Help in San Diego", followed by an advertisement looking like an article touting a private mediator with a law degree, but apparently someone who never passed the bar examine to become a lawyer. Aside from the irony of starting by offering free help, then charging, the page contained a lot of misinformation.

As with much mediator advertising, it was peppered with misstatements about the cost of the legal process. It reported that lawyers charge "at least $500 per hour" and many charge non-refundable retainers as much as $7500, and "total fees of $100,000 are not unheard of for a divorce."

Although legal services are expensive, let's set the record straight. In San Diego, the number of competent lawyers consistently charging $500 or more per hour is probably well under a dozen. Yes, a divorce can cost $100,000 or more, but that's because the parties are unreasonable and lousy candidates for mediation in the first place - and few lawyers have done cases that have gotten that expensive.

Retainers of $7500? Again a small number of lawyers, or those where the attorney knows going in that there is going to be a large amount of work to do, or there are other issues [a lot of property to keep track of, custody disputes, prior lawyers, a particularly obnoxious attorney on the other side] - and non-refundable retainers are generally prohibited in California, so you are only going to pay for the actual work needed.

And, this person bragged that most cases are mediated for less that $5,000: Now that's still a fine fee to charge if you are a lawyer, and in my experience far more than having a competent family law lawyer mediate your divorce and process it through the courts, as long as the people are reasonable and mature. Yes, most of us charge on an hourly basis for the work, so there is no limit, but you can have it done competently for less, in most cases.

One regular warning I make here is that you need to examine the credentials of the mediator: In my mind, it is more than taking a short class in how to help people reach agreements, and knowing some basics about the law. You want accurate information about your legal rights and responsibilities and knowing the mediator's thought processes have been honed by litigation, where biases and assumptions are tested daily. A J.D. degree means the person went to law school - it does not mean or imply the person knows the law, or ever competently practiced. Masters and Bachelor degrees are meaningless in choosing a mediator.

There is no substitute for education and experience as a family law specialist with years of litigation experience. Scare tactics to draw you in should be viewed with suspicion. If you can hire a true expert for the same price, why go to someone with a good sales pitch that lures you in with a promise of free or cheap resolution of your divorce? Someone who badmouths competitors on the basis that they are educated, knowledgeable, and experienced. There are a few, money hungry lawyers, whom you can't trust, but the vast majority know what they are doing and went into the legal profession because they wanted to be able to help people.

On a law practice website I share with a friend, we have an article about non-lawyers and inexperienced lawyers pretending they can mediate a divorce settlement - sure, they MIGHT be able to help the parties achieve a fair and cheap resolution of their issues, but if that happens it is by accident.

An essential part of the process is that each side knows his or her rights. These cases aren't about two businesspersons or two neighbors fighting over a contract or boundary dispute, it's about fundamental fairness between two people who owe each other about the highest duty known to the law: That, coupled with the ability of each to continue to function financially, to provide housing and food on their tables, plus some semblance of a normal standard of living. Half the process is ensuring that each party knows his or her rights, and the other half is getting them to be reasonable in assessing the alternatives.

Within the last month, I've had two prospective clients come see me who have been in the mediation process with unqualified mediators. In one case, two "housewives" with no semblance of training in law or mediation, have a website - they are giving the married partners their untrained version of family law, performing guideline calculations with no evidence they know what judges do with various financial issues, and when they are done they are preparing a marital settlement agreement, which is the unlawful practice of law.

In the other case, the parties have been before a trained therapist for more than 2 years, and have not a single written agreement to show for it. Has it lasted so long because they are progressing to a meaningful conclusion? No evidence of that, and the parties don't seem to be getting along well, either. Do they know anything about the law? Not much from what I could tell.

If your goal is to gain an advantage because you know more about your rights than your spouse, you may perceive it is to your advantage to drag him or her to an untrained person to mediate the divorce - on the other hand, you may be in for an expensive litigation battle when the other decides to set aside your divorce decree and require you to start over, or in anger abandons the process and proceeds to litigation.

Your choice of mediator should include only those with a substantial background in family law, and mediation training.

Continue reading "Rancho Santa Fe, Divorce, and Google: Too Much Information...." »

A friend sent me an e-mail in response to a post about misleading ads by lawyers.  Along with it was a link to a San Diego lawyer who brags on his website that he's the recipient of "a prestigious award."  I know the award, and there is no prestige associated with it - in fact, it's like a movie getting "four tomatoes;" you probably don't want to go see it, and you don't see it in the movie posters.

One premise of the best seller Freakonomics the disparity of information between experts and their customers makes it impossible for the latter to determine how to do the expert's job, how to know if the expert is making things up, or whether the expert truly has any expertise.  As a result, the expert gets paid a lot of money because he knows the secret information.  There is a huge information gap, resulting in the expert getting paid a lot for access.

This is changing rapidly as the world turns toward the Internet, where there is actual information you can use if you dig deeply enough, available free to everyone.  While I can't recommend that most clients use the Internet to do their divorces or other legal work, they can use it as a way of confirming what they are told or providing a list of questions to ask their attorney. 

There is still no substitute for the knowledge of the lawyer about how court's work, what particular judges do, how certain opponents approach their cases, and the nuances of the law.  But there are many websites providing limited information on calculating guideline support [assuming you know what to input into the program], and case law is available from many sources.  You just need to be careful applying what you read, because the facts of your case may be different from those of your friend, or from the examples you find online.  And, there are wide variances from state to state, and even from county to county.

It is impossible in a blog to discuss where and when you should seek out a lawyer, but I can state from experience in representing lawyers and their spouses in divorce cases that even lawyers who practice in other fields don't understand family law when they read it.

Now, back to the ad.  The award is named after a California Code section, and is given periodically by a local association.  Sounds impressive, until you read the code section itself:

Continue reading "Lawyer Ads, Freakonomics, and Unequal Information...." »

Continue reading "Advertising and the "Rancho Santa Fe" Divorce...[or Del Mar, etc.]" »